Monday, October 11, 2010


Hello Candy!

Hi, I don't know what to say.. I guess I miss Papa so much that I cried in bed tonight. I cried my heart out. I don't know why I did but truthfully, I miss him. I miss everything about him. I miss his voice, I miss his face, I miss listening to him, looking at him, shaking his hand, telling him it's time to eat, giving him his rice, how he would drink my drinks and feel not guilty about it, i miss him.. I can't tell you how much but i miss him. 

Papa, I miss you! 
I cried today because of you. I cried knowing your no longer here. You're not going to see me graduate and get married and have children. You're not going to hold my children as if their your grandchild. You're not going to be there when I'm getting married. I hate knowing all this. I hate having the feeling that some how some where you are near to me. I know your so far but your so near. Sometimes, I try calling your phone or texting it but I couldn't I am afraid. Papa, I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I don't know what to do. I can only see your photo now, that is how I can look at you. I can only remember your voice now. but everyday, that voice is fading but my heart will not let it fade because as your daughter i miss you terribly that it hurts me. papa, i don't know what to do. 

papa I love you

bye candy.. I'm continuing crying. i can stop it...

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